House Of Random

Monday, October 31, 2005

New #1 Dj

The top DJ in the world is announced for 2005, as published annually by DJ Mag. See the run down here.

A legend and worthy winner.

Congratulations... Paul van Dyk!

Don't forget to check out my current Tunes of Note.

Thursday, October 27, 2005

The Saga of Bloodninja

Hey, wanna cyber?

Gang up on the dopple

Oh yeah, forgot to mention - the best thing I am going to do in January is go drinking with this guy.

My namesake, from the other side of the world. He's coming to party and I can't wait!

Dude, if you read this - it's in the diary!


Ill space

Well, today I am ill. HAve been since yesterday. So although it's the nicest October day in half a millenium, I'm inside. SUCK!

Well, to pass the time I'm listneing to all my music and concentrating on getting better. Yesterday I had my first filling ever too. That was annoying! I guess beer isn't the great mouthwash we all thought it was. Dentist dude reckoneded that it could have been inevitable - something to do with natural cavities as your teeth grow, and that mine was just in the wrong place and got all yukky.

Got to learn to floss too. Anyone honestly know how the fuck to do it properly? I always cheesewire my gums.

So anyhow, signed up to My Space, cos so many people wanted me to (Read: my flatmate kept bugging the shit out of me). So now I'm up there, so go check it out. It really only points back here so it'll be a fun web-clicky-goose-chase round in circle thing. But I'm sure you've nothing better to do anyway.

Anyway, back to bed for me. And what the hell is that weird smell? Is it me? it can't be. Oh no, wait, it is. I hate illness. What a fet-pit I am.


PS. I'm not at work - so email me at gmail, please. I'm bored.

Friday, October 21, 2005


Well, at least today didn't start with a torrential downpour that laughed at my pathetic attempts at heavy rain protection and subsequently mocked me when my foot involuntarily left the pavement and descended into an overflowing drain where the rancid runoff rocked up and into my shoes, lapping at my ankle and drenching every fibre of my canvas shoe. That's the main thing. Glad *that* didn't happen.


On the other hand, now that I've got to work and it's sunny and I am inside I am able to appreciate the irony.

My mood was lifted when the ever-observational Pookey emailed me with this concise diagnosis:

"WOMEN ARE MENTAL. Its an illness. Having two X chromosomes f*cks you up."

Tuesday, October 18, 2005

The Yes/No Game

Play the Yes/No game.

An interesting site for those male readers with an active imagination.

Smell you later

So for the last week or so there's been a very strong, very unpleasant smell that seems to hang outside the door to my flat.

I live on the first floor, so there's a stairwell, and the hall downstairs smells maybe a bit musty, but then as you get close to our door. WHOA! What's that?

Now, we've had a few bags of clothes outside to take to the charity shop and a box of old magazines for recycling just sort of hanging about. I thought I'd tidy them to try and discover what the smell was. Biggest worry from the girls was that something had crawled into my old pants and died. Not entirely impossible.

But it's not coming from there. I checked. I tidied everything away and the smell was not tidied with it. I gave up searching and decided it was just the floor. Get me some Febreze, Butler!

Then this morning I decided to have another look. And I discovered just exactly what was causing it.

It's coming from the flat upstairs. Now, the flat upstairs has been unoccupied since we moved in about 4 months ago. We never have call to venture up there, and indeed until yesterday the stairs have been blocked by clothes and stuff for recycling. But this monring I got curious and went up to have a look to see if something had run up and died at the top of the stairs.

I ventured up, the smell got more potent and disgusting. The air up there barely circulates, so my huge frame stirred it up nice and good and I was enveloped in the rancid stench.

I discovered the door of the flat was wide open (and the mortice has been set so it can't shut). The smell was coing from inside. It took about five minutes to find. I just followed my nose. Well, actually I just moved around to see which part of the empty flat gave me the most reason to throw up. I thought it was the fridge, but that was stuck half open and was only midly smelly. The owner will have to replace that I'm sure. I thought it was the fridge because maybe the power had been cut for non-payment and it was just a bit smelly. In fact I think the gas and electricty have been both been cut off.

The water definitely has.

How do I know? Because I found the source of that ghastly smell in the bathroom.

Believe me - it was gag-tastic. The water has been cut off. There's no water in the toilet bowl.

And the toilet bowl isn't clean.

That's what the smell was. Months old, rotting feacal streaks in a dry and unsanitised toilet bowl.

Butler! Pass me the bleach!

Tunes of Note

Announcing... a new blog. By me. To accompany this one. And, honestly, to rip off my buddy Teeg who has one a bit like it.

I've started a music blog. It's called "Tunes of Note" - did you see what I did there? Clever, huh?

It'll have details of the music I've been listening to, and any tunes that I think are worth mentioning. No strict timescale on posts, but at least once a week. Most likely more often, when I listen to something I like, I'll blog it. Probably likely maybe more often about dancier type music, but that's not to say the buds that hide in my ears will not funnel sound waves of more varying genres deep into my ear canal where those tiny little hairs will bob and weave and dance to some twisted jazz or something.

Oh and if I really hate a tune I might blog that too. Actually if that starts to take over I might have to start a new blog. But we'll leave it as it is for now...

Friday, October 14, 2005

Xtreme Golf

1000ft above the Derbyshire countryside on Thorpe Cloud at around 10am the sport of "Xtreme Golf" was born.

A 30 minute hike carrying the £1.97 kiddy-golf set lead to some tricky holes across the 15ft wide peak.

Next year Xtreme Golf will find more players scaling still higher and more treacherous peaks in search of the thrill of sinking a difficult putt while standing above the clouds.

Monday, October 10, 2005

An American Wolkoff In London

Ian came to visit... and it ROCKED!

Thanks so much to everyone who was a part of the cast in this crazy and awesome week. Here's a couple of pictures...

The awesome School Disco at Hammersmith - the girls were in actual £4 school dresses from Woolworths. The zips wouldn't do up all the way... but they were for 12-13 year olds!

The inimitable Redback! Here's the gang - we grew in numbers by about 5 more people as the night wore on, it was a proper gathering!

You know there's always that person who pops up in shot... well this is our Kirst. And it's probably one of the funniest things ever commited to film.

Dave couldn't believe his luck!

The insanity that is Selfridges, Birmingham. Yes, that is a shop. I thought it was a carpark when I first saw it.

Boys don't do shopping. Especially when they can sit on the floor of the Lego shop making "Lego Chav" people for half an hour instead.

The walkabout, Broad Street, Birmingham. Not long after this picture was taken, Lainey was too drunk to stand up. We'd been there 30 minutes.

Subsequently she was pretty ill the following day, and that left the boys to go dance the night away at Spin's closing party on Gas Street. Ooooh yeah!

The weekend closed with some great drinking in a local!

Here's to visiting Wolkoff in October 2006!

Tuesday, October 04, 2005

Mmmm Peach Yoghurt

things that have midly grated my conscience today #21: i can't find my nail clippers

hence my fingernails are tapping against the keyboard keys before the soft pad of my fingers. do you know how irritating that is?


the americans have gone home : (

i will post key pics from their stay for your enjoyment today!

check back before the close of the day...

Words, thoughts, dreams & ideas, dirtySi, London, UK, from the year 2005 onward